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Relationships: things to know before hitting 30

Marion Achieng by Marion Achieng
March 3, 2023
in Lifestyle
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When you have lived almost three decades on earth, you should be wiser than your time in your early twenties. Experiences help you understand yourself better, fostering better decision-making. Feelings can cloud your judgment but as you age, you should be better grounded and able to see things for what they are. Here are things you should know about relationships by the time you are 30 years old.

It’s never that serious

Being in love can cloud your judgment and make you ‘stupid’ sometimes but that is part of growing up. You may find yourself doing everything in your power to make things work. You may forgive here and there, compromise, or even give up your happiness. However, when you have tried everything to be on the same page and it is not working, sometimes it is better to let go of the relationship. Your twenties should not be wasted on making someone else happy when they do not care about your well-being.

Don’t make assumptions

Clear communication is a vital part of any relationship. Do not make any assumptions; instead, clearly convey your wishes or concern. No one is a mind reader. If you are concerned about something, find a good time to tell your significant other about it. Do not assume that the other person already knows how to treat you in whichever matter. No one is born knowing everything about relationships and people. We all learn things along the way. Communicate clearly to ensure your partner knows what you mean.

Both feelings and facts matter

We spend so much time on feelings. One decision based on a feeling can change your life forever. Yes, emotions matter but facts are also important. No matter how strongly you feel about something, remember to also check the facts about the situation. Feelings are great but never allow them to control your life, especially on essential life decisions.

Standing up for yourself matters

We all have personalities that determine our behavior and each personality has downsides. Nonetheless, understanding yourself better as you age helps you stand up for yourself. Being in a relationship calls for patience and knowing that people are different. However, there comes a time when you have to stand up for yourself. Do not allow someone to boss you around like a nobody. You are important and deserve to be treated with respect and so does the other person. A mature partner listens to you and values your opinion. You should not be the only one compromising.

You can always start over

A breakup is not the end of life. This should not be taken to mean giving up easily on someone you love. However, when you are the one doing the heavy lifting in a relationship, it is likely the other person does not value you as much. You are young, and hanging on to a person who does not put as much effort into a relationship as you do is not worth it. You can always start over instead of spending your adult life begging to be loved.

Relationships can be wonderful and also messy. Knowing how to navigate the storms in life helps shape your future. There are things you should not be doing after you hit 30. You deserve respect, love, and happiness and a mature person understands these values. You do not have to beg to be loved or make constant compromises for someone who does not make any effort in a relationship.

 

 

 

 

 

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Marion Achieng

Marion Achieng

Marion Doreen is the co-founder of News 9 Kenya. She holds a Bachelor's Degree in Communication and Journalism from Moi University. Marion specializes in writing news and lifestyle articles.

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